I've gone from being depressed about my "breakup" to being manic. Usually this would bother me because mania isn't any better than depression, but I haven't gone completely over the edge (yet) so I feel it's better to be manic at the moment. At least I can get out of bed, I'm not crying incessantly and I can eat again. I am however, starting to feel angry about the whole thing and annoyed about not being able to be at home whenever I want. I'm trying to stifle these feelings since I know they aren't/won't do me any good.
I had plans to be at my parents house tonight for my birthday dinner. (I'm currently at their computer writing this.) So when I got here, my mom wasn't home yet from work, but my dad was here. (He's retired and therefore is almost always home.) When I first came in he seemed fine, asked me how everything was going and complained about it being hot & humid because of the rain. Then, out of no where he tells me he got a call today that Marie (his older sister and my aunt) died. Needless to say I was stunned. I wasn't expecting to walk in and hear that someone died. Marie had been very ill for a while. Last I had heard she had stopped eating and was bedridden and on constant morphine, so we knew the end was coming. However, one is never really prepared to hear it's happened. I think I'm still in shock about it. I don't know what the plans are as far as him going back to PA for the funeral. I know I won't be able to go and I don't know if mom will be able to either.
So, yet another crappy thing has happened this year around my birthday....this time it's affecting my family.
Have I mentioned I REALLY hate my birthday??
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